Bismillah,
Assalaamu alaikum
SubhaanAllah there are moments while memorizing Quran where I lose myself in the words and… and just allow myself to feel the rhythm of the letters. As I journey farther into the book I find that the ayaat are completely foreign to my mind and spirit.
As I try to etch the words on my heart I feel as though I am writing circles on water, quicksand, dough, then wet cement. When I reach this point I just have to keep it fresh revising and reciting it everyday until it solidifies on my heart. But how long will that take?
I used to think that memorizing Quran would get easier once I was able to be consistent. But that isn’t the case (yet?). The more I chase after it the more it seems to disappear. It evades my grasp leaving me to wonder if I am doing something wrong. Then the ayaat begin to overlap and I time warp from one sura to another, connecting different meanings and getting lost in the sounds.
Then I smile. Then I turn and grin. Allah is with me and this is my path. This journey is the medicine that I need in my heart. This is the healing I’ve been looking for. Quran is a cure for everything in the breast. Sometimes I guess I need to take my medicine slowly.